10 Things They Need To Bring Back From The 90's
Posted On: 25/10/2016
By: She's Funny For A Girl
In a time where we are bombarded daily with bad news sometimes we just need to take it back to a simpler era where the thing that worried us the most was how thin we could get our eyebrows *slips into an internal cringe coma and eventually dies*
- The dream team that was Ashanti and Ja rule
We all wanted to be Ashanti because her voice and style was more attainable than Beyonce. Even though her eyebrows were thinner than my patience for a gobshite. All is forgiven Ashanti, it was 2002 and you didn't know any better.. To be honest, bring back her whole back catalogue. Go youtube it now, you're welcome.
- Rhinestone on denim
This one doesn't even need explaining. I just want to reminisce about being a carefree 8 year old and the biggest decision I had to make on a day to day basis was Shreddies or Cheerios....and rhinestone on denim does that for me.
- Blu cantrells lip gloss in 'breathe' ft Sean Paul
The level of shine she reached was actually brighter than my own future. I mean, she just drove around all day picking her mates up and using her cheating boyfriends credit card to go on shopping sprees. She was slaying before slaying was even a thing.
- Finding a fulfilling relationship with a partner who'd 'hold you down'
A time where it was cool to have a strong relationship with one person. People aspired to be like Posh and Becks, Bey and Jay, Will and Jada, Brad and Angelina.. oh wait. It wasn't cool or funny to cheat. It was a time where you actually had to get to know a person and build trust to forge a meaningful relationship. It wasn't as easy as 'sliding into her Dms' or liking his fire selfie. Fast forward to present day where being petty and cold and savage is cool and making each other jealous by liking other peoples pictures to (ironically) show how much we like each other... I mean can you imagine Jay Z liking Becky with the good hair's selfie, I don't think so, we'd be treated to Lemonade Vol 2 – The Murder.
- Sabrina the teenage witch
Using an American TV show about a teenage witch as escapism, instead of getting drunk and being convinced that our cats can verbally communicate with us whilst casting spells on our exes.
- Body glitter
The spiritual ancestor of contour and highlight and they have a lot to thank it for. It was the start of unnecessarily highlighting features like our collar bones and hams arms. Until we realised it took approximately 14 years and countless harsh exfoliants to scrub off. Still, it's a sacrifice I'm willing to make to look somewhat like a mermaid.
- Eve's paw print boob tats
I mean, who wouldn't want to look like their adorable little puppy has just jumped up on them and left the cutest little paw prints?! Classic, spectacular, iconic. And will definitely be making a return to mainstream fashion any time soon....
- S club 7 magazine subscriptions
They were the first lesson in saving your pocket money and committing to a payment plan because you just neeeeeded next weeks lilac frosted lipstick.
- Calling out scrubs
It's 2016 and guys are still hanging out the passenger side of their best friends ride, trying to holla at me. Being able to call a lad out when he's being a bit of a twat and not getting called a feminist or bruising their already fragile ego is something of a by gone era.. Or not responding to a derogatory cat call and being met with....' You're fat anyway, don't even fancy you'. Funny that, because I was fat 32 seconds ago lad when you were desperately trying to get my attention. Wind your neck in and sort your life out because we all know you still get your mum to do your washing and make you chicken flavour pot noodles whilst you sit in your underwear playing on your PS4, you 30 year old baby. #Idontwantnoscrub
- Going braless
Remember Jennifer Aniston constantly going braless in friends, so chic, so modern and no one batted an eyelid, or Pamela Anderson in her iconic extreme high leg red swimsuit in bay watch? - nips galore. But when I have an accidental nip slip in Tesco whilst reaching for the organic goji berry superhuman 'made from unicorn tears' breakfast bars (OK I was reaching for the pizza dough balls) I get asked to leave because I've upset the children, like wow so rude. I was trying to emulate a Gigi Hadid vibe but I can see this isn't appreciated here.
So if someone wants to hook me up with some 90s Lil Kim nipple covers, that'd be greaaaat.
Till next time,